down on my knees crying

{ February 20, 2008 @ 2:21 am } · { Uncategorized }

When u feeling like everything in life is piling up on you what do you do. When you cry every night and you feel like God is listening but because you haven’t been in his favor he doesn’t feel like your worthy of his help, what do you do? When you feel like you letting everyone who is depending on you and wants to see you succeed down, what do you do? I feel like this all the time lately and I have lost all motivation in life, I am continuesly depressed. I want school to be over with and at one point I was thinking about taking a break from school because im doing so bad and cant concentrate on anything. My studies and suffering and my work is below average. But im not a quitter and I never have been but I need to make some decisions, decisions that are right for me and that will put my life back in order. I should always listen to my mother and I did not listen to her when she told me something this semester and I did not pay attention and in the end she may be right. I really wanna ask God to help me because I know I cant continue to make it one more day if I dont get a answer from him( and I not trying to rush it but it would be great if it came soon). I feel so blessed to wake up everyday but as each day goes on it seems like the devil is pressing down harder because he wants to see me fail. I think I need a break away from VCU where I dont do anything but relax and get my mind together and not have any responsibility but being with my family and friends and  enjoying the simple pleasures of life. So as I am writing this  I am beginning to cry  because im just really stressed and scared about what life has in store for me. tomorrow I am going to make some changes and hopefully fix some problems and hopefully everyone in my life will understand and not change there views of me.This is just a release of my feelings. Just keep your head up readers and I will keep you posted on my hectic life! Be Blessed and I will talk to you soon.

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